day 69-71: the journey

28.09.10: day 71

i struggled today.

my energy has been low (sick? weather? sleep?) and all day i felt like crawling back into bed. i finally took myself to the ymca in the evening and did a 30 min jog on the treadmill and 3 sets of 500 meter rowing sprints (crossfit anyone?). my best time on the rowing sprints was 2:04.

i found it really hard to push myself beyond that 'difficult' point. i guess i like to stop when i get too tired or when the activity becomes 'too hard'. i started to question myself. what does this say about how i deal with challenges in my life?

that is one reason why i really enjoy my outdoor rec pursuits. there is often a breaking point. a point where you want to go home. you want to cry. to want to stop. but when you are out in the wilderness with a team depending on you, you are forced to find a way to keep going. and sometimes that means breaking down, showing that vulnerability, and with the support and compassion from your team you do move on. these challenges really show me a deeper level of myself and looking back on these memories, i can see how strong i have become.

but how does this translate into the gym or into my daily workouts? or maybe more importantly, why am i not learning from these similar situations?


i feel worn down. i am so close to finishing this incredible challenge but i'm questioning what i have accomplished. what have i accomplished? what have i proven? what is this really about?


my wise friend JU would say "it's about the journey. it has always been about the journey".







27.09.10: day 70

walking.
no motivation.
feeling overwhelmed by other areas of my life.


26.09.10: day 69

yoga today.
i'm generally really enjoying the sunday yoga class i've been attending but each class definitely challenges me in ways i never thought yoga would.
class today was difficult. we did a lot of forward bends and i find i have tight hamstrings and very little flexibility in these postures. but i did hold a wonderful tree pose for longer than i thought i could. that is a point of pride :)
yogi wisdom: "we do not use our bodies to get into the poses, but the poses to get into our bodies".